February 5, 2,001
New Voice In The Lead

Latest news from The Afterlife.

The Angelic Choir in The Kingdom Of God was struggling without a new flamboyant Assistant Director. Many, many names were suggested, but Saturday someone brought up the name Al Jolson and it was remembered that he had been approached on more than one occasion, to take over the singing leadership of The Choir.  John Lennon mentioned that he wished there was something he could do.  "Well you are the appointer of religious positions," somebody reminded him.
"That I am!"  John snapped.  He called Johann Sebastian Bach, the leader of The Choir, and they immediately headed off to Jolson's residence.
After some discussion Jolson finally surrendered to John's pleading.  "We do not just need a talent," John said, "we need a super talent.  I don't think anyone could do my music better than you."
Jolson answered, "You flatter me too much!  I did not actually want to get into religious singing again, but it appears circumstances will not permit me to stay on the sidelines.  I must also join the battle.  I will accept the position."
They all hurried back to The Choir, who greeted this news with more than a little enthusiasm.  Jolson is now practicing some of John's songs, and John has promised him that he will work on a couple more suited to his style.  But Jolson can do a pretty good version of "Stand Up!"  already, not to mention "Abide With Us Again."  When he sings it, it about brings you to tears.  I think They've found just the right talent to fill this important position.  No one else seemed to have that needed spark to ignite the fire that The Choir's music can create.
A question has arisen about the Petition Drive.  Someone has asked how old do you have to be to sign it?  Well, I first said at least 18.  But Lord Peter came back and said no, according to The Teachings Of God, a person is of age when they're 12, and responsible for their actions.  Anyone 12 years old and above may sign the Petition without parents' consent.  10 to 11 year olds may sign the Petition with their parents' consent.  The parents may simply write under the signature "As parent I give my consent," then sign their name.  Lord Peter's the Boss!  So that's the way it is.  This information will be posted on the web site.
The Kingdom Of God is putting Its full efforts into the victory of Ariel Sharon in the upcoming Israeli elections, in the hopes that They can end, forever, the current Mid East Peace Treaty, and bring Their own Peace Plan into the works.  Discourse this weekend, however, put a damper on everyone's hopes.  Some Catholics somewhere were discussing Al Jolson's appointment to The Choir.  One of them mentioned "Perhaps this will be the thing we need to bring Mary back."  The other Catholic commented "Well, perhaps its best that she not come back.  She will not let us worship her.  She has no official position.  Perhaps she is doing more good out there than she does here."  "Maybe you're right," the other Catholic answered.
Someone overheard Them and began to cry "You hear that?  They don't want Mary back because she won't let them worship her!"  Quite a discussion ensued, that within hours, had spread throughout the whole Kingdom Of God.  We wouldn't exactly call it a riot, just a heated discussion.  It was finally calmed down, but it shows how volatile the situation still is in The Kingdom Of God.  The slightest little thing can still set off discourse.  Things like this were unheard of two or three years ago.  We need a constant positive energy flow into The Kingdom Of God to wash out these negative vibrations left behind by The Dark One's influence, and bring back the stability that used to be where people could make little comments like this, there could be peaceful discussion, and people go about Their normal business.  We really, really need response from John's Petition Campaign.

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