we had a standard agreement that questions about The President's personal life outside of The Oval Office were not to be asked."
"Oh, come on, Howard!" the reporter put in, "Everybody knows what's going on. The public's got a right to know." "No, they don't sir," The President snapped. "If there is a relationship between this young lady and I THAT is our personal concern, NOT the public's! To tell you truthfully there IS no such a relationship, but if such a relationship was to ensue it's nobody else's business unless the young lady should feel that she has been made some promises that had not been kept then, perhaps, it would become a public affair, and DON'T compare any of my relationships to the relationship a President had some years ago which I condemned, and which I still condemn. Because THAT President violated his office and lied to The American people, and misused a young woman's trust. Now, do I make myself VERY CLEAR ladies and gentlemen?" A murmor of "Yes, Mr. President!" went through the audience.
"Do forgive my harshness," The President continiued, "but this is a matter that does not set well with me. I am a public official BUT I have a right to privacy in my private life. I know some disagree with that notion, but they had better not try to trample on my rights or they will find they have a tiger by the tail, and they're going to have a very hard time letting go."
Everyone laughed again. "Now," The President continued. "anything else?"
"Is there any chance, Mr. President," another reporter asked, "of increased trade with China? Many still feel the attitudes of yourself and your Presidency are not beneficial to the Chinese people or, The American peoples' interest. Can't some compromise be reached to again open the lucrative Chinese markets to American business? Others are taking advantage of our stubbornness and reaping great profits at our expense."
"You mean they're no longer able to profit at the Chinese peoples' expense," The President answered, "and the answer is no! If the Chinese will answer the concerns we have, remove themselves from Tibet, recognize Tiawan as an independent THEN we can build a true and meaningful relationship with them. But as long as they continue on the course that they have chosen there can be no delay, no compromise."
"Why so uncaring, Mr. President?" the reporter asked. "You're asking the Chinese to give up territory they rightfully feel is theirs. What if they insisted we give Florida back to the Seminoles?"
The President smiled. His press secreatary leaned closer and remarked, "Don't touch that one!"
"No comment!" The President answered.
"Mr. President!" a reporter asked, "there's rumors you might be going to South Korea yourself, to help plan the fighting. Any truth to that, sir?"
"None, whatsoever," The President answered. "I'm far too busy here at home."
He looked to his press secreatary. "We DO have that mission to Japan, don't we?"
The press secretary looked startled. "Is that still on, Mr. President?" the press secretary asked.
The President nodded. "That's as close as I'll be getting to Korea!" The President announced.
"Mr. President," a reporter asked, "what about the natural life peoples' lawsuit? They claim that your children are actually clones of you and your wife, and that you have violated the international agreements against cloning individuals. Any comments on that, Mr. President?"
"Not that I can say in mixed company," The President answered. "You know what I would like to do with Mr. Morganfield, and all of his associates! Unfortunately I am prohibited by law from doing so, which is very fortunate for Mr. Morganfield and his people. We have, on three occasions, given samples of our DNA and, samples of our childrens' DNA. On each ocassion the experts that examined those samples concluded that our children were conceived in the way children have been conceived since the beginning of time, and I am sick of hearing these ridiculous stories! Now, if you'll excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, that will be all for today!"
Somebody cried, "Thank you, Mr. President!" and The President quickly left. In the hall his press secretary stared at hiim questioningly. "Japan?" he asked.
"That's as close as we can get with Air Force One!" The President answered. "I'll fly an F-20 in from there, as part of a regular patrol. I'll be in and out before anybody knows I'm there."
"Oh, Jesus!" the press secretary moaned, "No way, Mr. President! Absolutely, positively NOT! It's too dangerous!"
"Dangerous or not," The President answered, "I'm GOING, Howard, don't argue with me. We'll leave Friday."
Sing ran up to The President, panting . "Mr. President!" she managed, "Your wife wants you RIGHT NOW! She says forget everything else, COME, NOW!"

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