The Ancient One and his companions were having a slow night.  They had gone far to the south of their native land and sent two corrupt police officers to their reward by causing their car to go over an embankment and land in a power transformer.  But they had found little else of interest.  They were heading home when cries from below caught The Ancient One's interest and he descended to a roof.  Across the way on the porch of a marina's restaurant two men were struggling with a young woman, fondling and kissing her as she screamed, while a third man held her struggling boyfriend.  The Ancient One turned to his female companion.  "Go to a pay phone," he ordered, "call the police!  Tell them a girl's being raped on the porch of The Westside Marina's restaurant and they'd better hurry."  He turned to his male companion and said "Stay here.  I feel like having some fun!  All of us aren't needed for a little job like this."
His male companion nodded and sat down.  The Ancient One winged away.  A few moments later his female companion returned and sat down by her friend.  "What's going on?" she asked.
Her friend shrugged.  Below them the struggle continued.  Then, another figure appeared on the end of the porch.  He was dressed in sailor's garb, smoking a pipe, and carrying a jacket.  He hummed a sea shanty as he went along. He had one squinty eye and his arms showed large, bulging muscles.  He came up to the struggle, tapped out his pipe on the sole of his shoe, put it in his pocket, then remarked, "Young feller, didn't anybody ever tell you it's very improper to be touching a young woman where you're touching her?"
The youngest of the attackers laughed.  "An old man tried, once," he answered, "and we broke both his legs because he couldn't mind his own business!  What are you gonna do, old man, if I don't stop?"
The sailor put his coat over the rail, turned back to the young man, and said "First, this!"  He punched him with his left hand, and the young man began to spin around and around, "then, this," the sailor continued, and he punched him with his right hand, and the young man spun in the other direction,  "and finallys," the seaman concluded, "this!"  He gave the young man an upper cut with his left hand and he sailed over the rail to land in the water with a tremendous splash!  The young man began to scream "Uncle Bob! Uncle Bob! Help me!"
The older man holding the girl threw her away, reached inside his coat, and pulled out a gun.  But before he could point it at the seaman the seaman grabbed a chair and swung it with horrendous force hitting the gun and sending it flying into the water!  "No, no, Uncle Bob!" he remarked, "No toys!  Just our hands.  Wes fight like gentlesmens."  The big man gave a loud cry and charged forward.  The seaman began to beat him furiously, his hands flying so fast they could barely be seen.  As he did so, he began to whistle a sea shanty.  On its final notes he gave another upper cut and Uncle Bob joined his nephew in the water.  The seaman then turned to the man holding the girl's companion.  "I's thinks you'd better lets go of him and sit down right there until the police get here, unless you want a thrashing, too."
The man nodded, let go of the young man, and sat down in the nearest chair.  The young woman ran up, threw her arms around the seaman, and gave him a kiss on the cheek.  "Thank you!" she cried, "Thank you!  God bless you!"
The seaman pulled her away.  "Thinks nothin' of it, me darlin'!" he remarked. "T'wern't nothin' at all!  But no more of that, or me own darlin' will be quite perturbed with me!  Good night, younguns!"  The seaman picked up his jacket and headed off as two police cars pulled in to the end of the restaurant's porch and officers rushed up.
"What's going on here?" one of them demanded, as two others fetched life preservers and threw them to the struggling men in the water.
The Ancient One returned to the roof where his male companion was rolling back and forth convulsing with laughter.  They stayed a few minutes to watch the proceedings.  Detectives arrived and began taking statements.  When they were done one of them stood scratching his head.  "I know you believe what you're saying, miss," he remarked, "but it couldn't possibly have been who you think it was!  He's just an imaginary character, he doesn't exist!"
The cooperative prisoner pointed to his drenched friends now wrapped in blankets.  "Tell THEM that!" he remarked.  "They sure think he exists!"
 Another detective walked up holding something on the end of a stick.  "What's that?" the lead detective asked.
"It's a can of spinach," the new man answered.  I found it over there by the end of the porch.  It hasn't been opened with an opener, the top's been ripped off, simply ripped off!"
"Put it in an evidence bag!" the senior detective muttered.  "How in the hell am I gonna write this up?  Nobody's going to believe it!"
"Well, I do!" the girl put in, "And nobody can ever convince me it wasn't him!"
The detective shrugged.  "Take 'em home!" he told the uniformed officers, "Take 'em home!"
The Ancient One looked at his male companion who was still stricken with laughter.  "Come on!  We've gotta go find some returnables and leave them at the store with a note that I was in a hurry and didn't have time to pay for the spinach."
His male companion managed to gain his feet, struggling to maintain his composure.  "I wish I could do that!"  he managed between struggles.  "You put Loki to shame, my friend, you put him much to shame!"
"Let's go!" The Ancient One snapped.  In a short time the three of them managed to complete their task and they all soared home.  But several times The Ancient One's male companion almost lost control of his flight as he looked at The Ancient One and began to roar with laughter.